patience and precipitation

雨水

Took my new camera out to pick up a package and get groceries.

It’s extremely cold again. There’s a lot of snow piled up outside, and it was very windy when I went out at 4PM. I had a meeting with a mentee at 2:30PM, which lasted almost 2 hours. She didn’t seem put off by my wordiness and inflated sense of self, so I will take that as a win. I had a meeting with the other co-chair yesterday and they said that sometimes I say the most innocuous things in a way that seems like an insult. I honestly thought it’d be the other way around (i.e. I say mean things in a nice way), but you know what. It’s fine either way. I fear I’m sometimes too blunt and that people would be less likely to listen to my advice, but it’s not like I’m the only person making announcements.

Anyway, that was boring. I picked up a package today from the post office, and it was a manga volume that I almost forgot I had bought. The art is lovely and I’m happy I finally own something like this. I also bought a sandwich and some snacks. Because it’s so cold outside, the snow piles have turned into slush and ice so I have to be very careful while walking, which is doubly as hard when holding bags of groceries.

It’s reading week this coming week! I’m going to try to get ahead with readings and stuff, and also continue working on my thesis project. Things are happening so quickly, which I’m feeling somewhat conflicted about. I guess it isn’t anything too deep or torturous this time around (graduation): 1) I will miss the freedom and the friends and the casual interactions, 2) I wish to be free of undergrad, 3) thesis is indeed painful and I need to take a real break, and 4) there are many pros and cons to living at home as a young adult. (LOL)

A sunset photo from earlier in February.

I’m actually still quite sleep-deprived, so I’ll share some photos I took recently.

I got my hair bleached and cut for grad photos. My friends laughed at them and said At Least You Look Happier than in Grade 12. Very true. I am cultivating my eyebags to suit my aesthetic. I have had eyebags for as long as I’ve had my face, so it’s more of a matter of somehow making everything fit together. I sort of look like an effeminate man crossed with a nerd teenager at an Asian-dominated secondary school in Burnaby with a tiny bit of middle-aged-man in there somwhere. I don’t think my friends are ever surprised by the things I do, which sounds about right. Maybe.

Right! I forgot that I started another casual not-really-a-project. The main purpose of the new camera is to take better short clips and then make little videos about what I’ve been up to each month. It’s not very exciting to be honest, but then again, neither is writing or anything that I’ve persisted in doing. It’s more of an attrition thing, where I hope that by forcibly making things, no matter how mundane and shitty, I get Better at making things. Directionless grinding.

Alright, that’s it for now. I’m gonna watch some TV shows and eat snacks.

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